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Then a flight attendant jumps on the intercom, and instead of providing soothing words, she says the worst thing imaginable – “We don’t want to die.”SNL skit, but it happened to Ryanair passengers on a flight from Glasgow to Dublin on Jan.18. " data-reactid="15"The flight was horribly delayed, and passengers were getting antsy after sitting on the tarmac for eight hours.

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When I discovered I’d be flying with Blanche, the no-nonsense veteran who never smiled, I was scared. By the end of the trip, I knew not only how to perfect my drink cart, but also how to cook rice in the coffee pot.

“Here,” she handed me the strange utensil at the end of our last flight, “you’ll never need another piece of silverware in the air again.” And I haven’t.

Senior Mama An affectionate term used to describe veteran flight attendants.

As a newbie, I had heard horror stories about flying with the Senior Mamas.

While the term disembark is sufficient, I’ve given in and started using the current lingo.

So, when you hear deplane, it just means it’s time to remove yourself from the aircraft. Bulkhead" data-reactid="66"Bulkhead The two sisters sat in the front row of first class when I noticed the small red gift bag at their feet.

“And we don’t want to die.”Related: 5 Times ‘SNL’ Got Travel Right" data-reactid="18"Flight attendants should probably avoid talking about death on the plane’s intercom system.

(Photo: Getty Images)Passengers erupted in laughter after the brutally honest, yet inappropriate announcement.

“I’m sorry, ladies, but you are seated in the bulkhead and I’ll have to put that gift bag in the overhead compartment,” I said pointing to the lack of under the seat storage.

The sister at the window willingly handed over the merchandise. “It’s our mother,” the one in the aisle giggled, “and we are giving her the Weekend at Bernie’s trip.” I shut the bag in the overhead as my face turned the same shade as the bag.

I know flight attendants get to stay at hotels for free, but what if they are not on schedule?

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